You know, sometimes I like to think that I am like an anti-body. i go to where im needed, make things feel better, watch over then until they are good, then i cease to be important anymore. it seems as if i am only needed some of the time and when im not needed anymore i am thrown away. its happened about seven times before.
not that i dont mind, i like improving peoples' lives and having them feel better, but i sense that its going to happen again soon, and i wont be needed anymore, the disease is gone and im still just left here for a short while until everything is up and running how it needs to be. idk when this cycle will break, one day maybe i can fight something like cancer. something that wont go away. then again the person who is sick might undergo radiation treatments and i will cease to exist..
kinda how i put myself out there, and if i keep doing it i might die or get sick myself and there is no anti-body out there to help me. who the hell is going to be my anti-body?! there was only one and i let him go. he doesnt care if im sick now, he really doesnt, if i was in a hospital dying of cancer he wouldnt even know or care.
i hate how i lost my anti-body, i really do, idk if im ever going to find another one, or one that can fight away my sickness as well as he did.
sorry for such sad references...im feeling depressed.
goodnight, travel well.
Kristin Fort
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